Today’s reason – Conversation

Today’s probably a good day to test this new philosophy, given how spectacularly Monday-like it’s been. Between being overtired this morning, to being understaffed and overworked since 8am at work, to spilling a completely full, large tea at the coffee place on my break, I kind of want to kill someone. Probably not the best idea. A better idea would be to ruminate over the connection I wanted to feel hopeful about today, before everything went Monday on me.

Soooooo…conversation. It seems like such a simple thing. We have conversations with people every day, right? We ask how much this thing is, we ask how someone is doing, we tell someone we’ll be there in 5 minutes…but that isn’t what we *need*. What we all need is to be heard. We need to know, when someone asks us how we’re doing, that they really want to know, right? I was thinking about that yesterday, as I sat listening to my friend pour her heart out to me, sobbing. She didn’t necessarily need me to respond with anything more than love.

Now, I know, that isn’t your typical conversation, but I took this thought a little bit further later last night, as I sat with my step-grandmother at her 90th birthday celebration. Now, I have massive respect for her, and the life she’s lived. She’s buried 2 husbands and survived 3 bouts of cancer herself, and she’s still going strong. But she has a tendency to focus on a subject and pretty much monologue her way through many interactions. It’s something the whole family kind of rolls their eyes at, myself included. But recently I’ve taken the role of active listener; engaging in the topic, asking more questions and really listening to what she has to say. And I learn so much! I feel a connection to her that I would’ve squashed by turning off and tuning out, if I’d followed my habits.

I want to feel that connection with more people, not just those I love. I feel like establishing that connection, when you interact with people, honours them. It shows them that you recognize their humanity, that what they say, think and feel matters. And maybe that connection is what gets them through their day, or their week, even. Can you imagine being able to affect someone like that?

Truly a gift.

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